Physical Abuse:
Pulling your hair, punching, slapping, kicking, biting or choking you
Forbidding you from eating or sleeping
Hurting you with weapons
Preventing you from calling the police or seeking medical attention
Harming your children
Abandoning you in unfamiliar places
Driving recklessly or dangerously when you are in the car with them
Forcing you to use drugs or alcohol (especially if you’ve had a substance abuse problem in the past)
Emotional/Verbal Abuse:
Calling you names, insulting you or continually criticizing you
Refusing to trust you and acting jealous or possessive
Trying to isolate you from family or friends
Monitoring where you go, who you call and who you spend time with
Demanding to know where you are every minute
Trapping you in your home or preventing you from leaving
Using weapons to threaten to hurt you
Punishing you by withholding affection
Threatening to hurt you, the children, your family or your pets
Damaging your property when they’re angry (throwing objects, punching walls, kicking doors, etc.)
Humiliating you in any way
Blaming you for the abuse
Gaslighting
Sexual abuse:
Forcing you to dress in a sexual way
Insulting you in sexual ways or calls you sexual names
Forcing or manipulating you into to having sex or performing sexual acts
Holding you down during sex
Demanding sex when you’re sick, tired or after hurting you
Hurting you with weapons or objects during sex
Involving other people in sexual activities with you against your will
Ignoring your feelings regarding sex
Forcing you to watch pornography
Purposefully trying to pass on a sexually transmitted disease to you
Sexual coercion:
Sexual coercion lies on the ‘continuum’ of sexually aggressive behavior. It can vary from being egged on and persuaded, to being forced to have contact. It can be verbal and emotional, in the form of statements that make you feel pressure, guilt, or shame. You can also be made to feel forced through more subtle actions. For example, an abusive partner:
Reproductive coercion is a form of power and control where one partner strips the other of the ability to control their own reproductive system. It is sometimes difficult to identify this coercion because other forms of abuse are often occurring simultaneously.
Economic/Financial Abuse:
Refusing to give you money to pay for necessities/shared expenses like food, clothing, transportation, or medical care and medicine
Forbidding you to work or limiting the hours that you can work
Maxing out credit cards in your name without permission or not paying the bills on credit cards, which could ruin your credit score
Stealing money from you or your family and friends
Living in your home but refusing to work or contribute to the household
Digital abuse is the use of technologies such as texting and social networking to bully, harass, stalk or intimidate a partner. Often this behavior is a form of verbal or emotional abuse perpetrated online. You may be experiencing digital abuse if your partner:
Sex Trafficking:
According to the United Nations, Sex Trafficking (a subset of Human Trafficking) occurs when someone uses “force, fraud or coercion to cause a commercial sex act with an adult or causes a minor to commit a commercial sex act.” A Commercial Sex Act includes prostitution, pornography, and/or sexual performance done in exchange for any item of value, such as money, drugs, shelter, food or clothes. If you believe you are a victim of sex trafficking, please contact The Avery Center. If you are interested in counseling, please contact me at the links at the top of the page.
Neglect:
Neglect is also considered abuse and can result in posttraumatic stress disorder. Neglect can be experienced as: physical, emotional, abandonment, and financial. An example of adults suffering from the effects of childhood neglect can be found in the blog NEGLECT: I See Myself in the Mirror – Can I be Invisible?
Please see my blog to understand the abuse cycle.